THE LAST GIRAFFE
Mulberry Coach
© 2017 Morris & Fisher 

 

1. The Last Giraffe

Too bad about you, so sorry bout your species
But we're bursting at the seams of the Earth
Extinction is a bitch but nothing lasts forever
After all what is a pelican worth?

We've got heavy appetites
And we need a whole lot of room
Jungle, ocean, savannah and dune
We'll take all you have
Down to the last giraffe

Smoldering coal seams underneath the forest
And the rivers are acidified sludge
Gotta stream The Walking Dead, plug my iPhone in my head
We're wired and we're not gonna budge

We've got heavy appetites
And we need a whole lot of juice
Coltan, bauxite, tungsten and gold
We'll take all you have
Down to the last giraffe

Where are the giants who lived underwater?
What became of the shining mayfly?
I must have dreamed the impossible creatures
On a blue spinning ball in the sky

Too bad about us, the yellowtails are gasping
And the elephants go down for their tusks
Don't worry about us, we'll find another planet
Say goodbye to this beautiful husk

We've got heavy appetites
And we need a whole lot of doom
All your flocks, hives, herds, all your pods and broods
We took all you had
Down to the last giraffe

 

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2. Holy Fools
Distributing goods
Doing a little bit more than she could
And doing so little good

Everyone knows
The tide never slows
It only grows and grows and grows and grows

Holy fools—they want to keep the sky from falling
Holy fools—they want to save the bats
Holy fools—let 'em weep, it is their calling
Cause only fools believe in that

Franky the Freak
Which Fortune 500 will it be this week
And why does he think

A flash mob and a blog
Could unboil the frog, undrain the bog
Make a tree out of a clearcut log

(chorus)

Everyone sees her, she's Mother Theresa
With a seating chart
Another fundraiser, another troublemaker
With a bleeding heart

You can go, you can go
Where the whistleblowers blow
But he's never doing time
Shelters are bursting, she's spending every dime
On the sick, evicted victims of his legal crime

You can hum along
There's not much use in a song
It doesn't right a wrong

So it's understood
I'm doing a whole lot less than I should
And doing no more good than any fool could

Holy fools—we want to keep the sky from falling
Holy fools—we want to save the brats
Holy fools—let 'em sleep until they're called
And only fools believe in that
Only fools believe in that

 

 

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3. Radio One-to-One
Radio One-to-One
Sit back, enjoy it, cause we're all tuned in to
Radio One-to-One
Don't you ignore it, that would be a sin
Listen and leave the world behind
No one will mind
Yes, turn it on
We're all tuned in to . . .

. . . Troubles, the daily bummers and bitches, yeah
But all of a sudden, something
Crashes in from the other side
Oh it's a little bit scary, crazy, lovely
Calling all hearts, oh yeah

Radio One-to-One
Push up the fader, wonder what you're hearing
Radio One-to-One
Under the radar, coming cool and clear
It's puzzling—was it really there?
No one will care
Radio One-to-One
Yes, turn it on
We're all tuned in to . . .


. . . Bad news, the useless hassles we cultivate
You wouldn't believe how easy
It is to let it go away
Oh we could pay no attention, a new dimension
Realer than real, oh yeah
Radio One-to-One

Sitting in a cave with all of my friends
Watching the silent movie
All at once from outside, voices in song
A carillon calling to me
And calling to you
Won't you come too

Something comes crashing in from the other side
Oh it's a little bit scary, crazy, amazing
Joining all hearts, oh yeah

Radio One-to-One
Lie down and love it cause we're both tuned in to
Radio One-to-One
We got plenty of it, let the fun begin
Listen and leave the world behind
No one will mind
Radio One-to-One
Yes, turn me on
We're all tuned in to

 

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4. Edge of Anywhere
There’s a line you can’t erase
And the shape it contains doesn’t change
The moment is only seemingly random
Oh yeah
And I loved you then
Till my heart went cold
Stop me now
I’ll tell it all again 

The tip of the tail of the tiger
The edge of anywhere
The death of the deep-sea diver
Running out of air 

You run for thirty days
On the thirty-first you turn the page
That relentless motion, it’s suddenly over
It’s over
Did you love me then
Till your heart went cold
Stop me now
I’ll tell it all again

(chorus)

Did I love you then
Till my heart went cold
Stop me now
I’ll tell it all again

There’s a line you can’t erase
And the story remains, it hasn’t changed
Stop me now
I’ll tell it all again

(chorus)

 

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5. Arctic Ruby
Let it go, let it go, and I won’t know any better

Become the change you want to be
Become the only one
Begin, and don’t you pity me
Come on, come on, begin to become 

Oh my Arctic Ruby
Oh my Arctic Ruby 

A shrinking gut, a happy life
A pot-bellied salmon and a scrimshaw knife
The little bird told me how
She could change the game if we start right now
And I know this was meant to be
And I know that ruby’s meant for me

Oh my Arctic Ruby
Oh my Arctic Ruby

Found myself in a terrible bind
Triple tested in a double blind
Could not find the medicament
That would put the bejesus back where it went
Now a cup of coffee in my submarine
And I’m set to boogie like a new machine
The little auk gave me the tip
It’ll be superior to a clipper ship

And I know this is my destiny
And I know that ruby’s meant for me

Oh my Arctic Ruby
Oh my Arctic Ruby 

And I know this was meant to be
Yes I’ll go extract that ruby
And I’ll live forever you will see
How I love my Arctic Ruby
Arctic Ruby, Arctic Ruby

 

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6. The Guys Downstairs
I’m waiting for the mailman but he passes me by
The teller says I don’t have any dough
The river out my window keeps rolling all the time
But me I don’t have any place to go 

The guys downstairs whisper about me
The guys downstairs they’ve stolen my keys
My laundry is missing and I spilled all my tea
I blame it on the guys downstairs 

My doctor says I’m nervous and she gave me some pills
I wish I knew how how to work the remote
My nephew keeps on asking if I’ve written my will
I don’t know if I can keep it all afloat

The guys downstairs whisper about me
The guys downstairs they’ve stolen my keys
My cupboards are empty and I can’t seem to pee
I blame it on the guys downstairs

I used to have a thousand friends
We’d be through wars together
All the best things come to an end
Now it’s just me and the cloudy weather 

I’ve been in line here since a quarter to one
My license was suspended and they won’t tell me why
My phone’s on the blink and Verizon hasn’t come
There’s gotta be more here than meets the eye 

The guys downstairs whisper about me
The guys downstairs they’ve bugged all the trees
My dinner got burned and my dog gave me fleas
I blame it on the guys downstairs

 

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7. Colorless Green Ideas
There’s a damn, a hoot, a rat’s ass
Some of the things that I couldn’t give
Along with love and a reason to live
Some of us stayed too young for a long time
Yeah, oh yeah, some of my thoughts were wrong
Yeah, oh yeah, I made you so unhappy 

Colorless green ideas
Colorless green ideas

There’s a drug you take for dreaming
The other one makes you stay wide awake
I’m sorry I made that second mistake
Some of us stayed too long for a fun time
Yeah, oh yeah, some of your thoughts were wrong
Yeah, oh yeah, you made me so unhappy

Colorless green ideas
Ideas, ideas
I sold it all for a mess of pottage
And colorless green ideas
Came back looking like Lutheran garbage
Get down on your knees

Jesus what does it take to get
Free of the furor inside of me
Jesus get ’em away from me
Colorless green ideas 

Yeah, oh yeah, a lot of my thoughts were wrong
Yeah, oh yeah, it made me so unhappy, and then
Another one came and another one came and
Another and another and another one came
My head was so full so I gave it a shake
Memories dancing down in the snowglobe

Yeah, oh yeah . . .
Yeah, oh yeah . . .
I could’ve made you happy
Get down on your knees 

Jesus what does it take to get
Free of the fuehrer inside of me
Jesus get ’em away from me
Colorless green ideas 

Jesus what does it take to get
Free of the guru inside of me
Jesus get em away from me
Colorless green ideas  

 

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8. Breath of Life
Odetta was my mother
Her song so deep and blue
Though just a little dove, I knew
What careless love could do

Carol was my mother
She put me to her breast
I suckled on such bitterness
I could not get my rest 

Betsy was my mother
When they threatened me with jail
She rose up and promised me
She would go my bail

Oh my family
Left me to wander unguarded and silly
The air was so chill, the mountains so foggy
Pink and defenseless
Oh how they pricked me

There's only so much any mother can do
They breathe you to life then it's all up to you

I was Ophelia's mother
She sang rosemary and rue
That pack of serpents drove her mad
There was nothing I could do

 

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9. Ducks in a Row/Human Shield
You know how I feel about my ducks
You know how I feel
You know how I feel about my ducks
You know how I feel
I want ’em in a row, a row
And that is how I feel 

You don’t think you’re haunted?
Step out from behind the human shield
Unlovely and unwanted
Hurry now and find a human shield

Human feelings are revealed
But the children know
You need a human shield 

Years go by like hours
Killing time on the battlefield
Yeah the years rain down like arrows
You’re cowering behind your human shield

Human feelings are concealed
The children know
You need a human shield 

No more hesitating
Step out now, you’re dying to be healed
A human might be waiting
Calling from behind another human shield

All your feelings are concealed
You’ve always known
You need a human . . .
You need a human . . .
You’ve always known
You need a human shield

 

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10. You Take Over Now
You take over now, I’ve lost my taste for it
You take over now
You take over now, I’d be a waste and you’d be
Better at it anyhow 

It’s getting late and I’m tired
I fired my best shot, so
You take over now, give it all you’ve got

You take over now, I’ve lost my zest for it
You take over now
You take over now, that would be best, and I could
Finally lay my burden down

It’s getting late and I’m tired
It’s been a long hard day, so
You take over now, I’ll be on my way

I fought the good fight, stayed on the right side
Of history’s arc
Marching in the dark
Now a new light is dawning
It shows how little has changed
The deck chairs rearranged
There’s a lot to do
For someone young like you 

Now a new light is dawning
It shows how little has changed
The deck chairs rearranged
We’re overdue
For someone young like you

You take over now, I’ve had my fill of it
You take over now
You take over now, though I’d be willing if
You really want me back somehow

It’s getting late and I’m tired
But I’ll give it one more shot, so
You take over now, we’ll give it all we’ve got
We’ll give it all we’ve got
We’ll give it all we’ve got

 

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11. What Have You Done
She’s counting one
She’s counting two
She’s counting three
She’s counting four – what have you done
What can I do
To set me free
What am I for – what have you done

Well it’s a stone cold killer arithmetic
The mathematics of attack
You can only take so many hits
Before you hit back 

He’s a reptile bully with a frozen heart
And he will play you tit for tat
You thought you held the highest card
But he can trump that 

Claim your sorrows when you count the cost
Divided by the love you lost 

(chorus) 

You get your food prepared by a slaughterhouse
They will serve you just the same
Let your news be whispered by a dirty mouth
You get a bad name 

Claim your sorrows when you count the cost
Divided by the love you lost

(chorus)

And all the good people congregate, they say
Oh yeah, she was the one
They come a-crying when it’s far too late
Oh my dear, what have you done

If you stumble in the temple with nails and a hammer
Don’t be surprised who’s crucified
But if you’re huddled up praying that he’s running out of ammo
Keep quiet

(chorus)

 

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12. By the Time You Hear This Song
By the time you hear this song
We’ll know
If everything went wrong
We’ll know
If decency sings louder than fear
By the time you hear this song

By the time you hear my voice
We’ll know
The meaning of the choice
We’ll know
If it was just another election year
By the time you hear my voice 

Hosanna, hosanna

By the time you hear this song
We’ll know
Where you and I belong
By the time you hear this song

 

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All songs © 2017 by J. Morris and Katie Fisher